This morning I made a delectable breakfast. We had egg white omelets with a dash of mild cheddar and some broccoli; some delicious toasted honey 7-grain wheat bread with I Can't Believe!! It's Not Butter on it; water and orange juice; and while we were eating the previously mentioned foods, some warm banana but (oops! hahahaha banana butt), banana NUT muffins were cooking in the oven.While we were waiting, I decided it was time. I had Madeline's undivided attention, well it was partially divided, but she was in regular eye contact with me, so I began explaining the whole "Santa Claus" thing to her. I told her (in so many words and I quote):
"Christmas time means a lot of things to a lot of different people. Some people celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ and the gifts that we sometimes give each other represent God's gift to the world - his only begotten son. It is a time to remember his life and his example. To spread peace and love with song and gift giving. Not that we should not do these things all of the other days of the year, but it is severely advertised around this time of year because December 25th represents Christ's birthday - although they say he was actually born in April... we'll get into that later.
Some people celebrate the season by serving others, being nicer than usual, doing a lot of shopping, eating a lot of naughty foods, and spreading stories of a man who lives in the north pole known as 'Santa' or 'Santa Claus' or 'Saint Nick'.
Most people here in the U.S. do BOTH of these things. Many of the shopping malls and stores and business people out there have taken advantage of this so you may see an advertisement for a Christmas item in August. Christmas is celebrated differently by many different cultures in many different ways. Some people don't celebrate it at all because they have different beliefs about freedom and about religion and God.
Santa Claus is thought to be a man. He is supposedly a really nice guy with rosy cheeks (probably a case of rosacea) and he speaks every language in the world. He's a people person and loves children of all ages. He is old and obese and he always wears a red and white coat with a black belt - a trend setter really, belts are back... sometimes he wears green to throw in some earthy tones. He has white hair that is quite long and curly and a beard and moustache. His stomach is large, often referred to as his "bowl full of jelly" because it jiggles when he laughs (a possible attempt to make a dangerous health situation funny to make himself feel better) so he probably suffers from diabetes and hypertension - he eats a lot of cookies, hot chocolate and candy. His laugh sounds like he is saying "ho ho ho". He has a wife, Angela Marie Claus, who is probably the one who makes him most of these cookies - living vicariously through him possibly?
He is said to reside in the north pole, which is located at the very top of the planet earth, the planet on which we live. He is quite isolated really for being such a people person... hmm. It is very, very cold up there, which is why he always wears this thick red coat with fur around the sleeves, neck, and ankles, and probably why he gets around in a sleigh - is slides nicely on top of the snow and ice. I am pretty sure Santa is rich, because his heating bill must be through the roof!!
Yes, he drives a sleigh. But it is not pulled by snow dogs, like they have in Alaska. It is pulled by reindeer. Magic reindeer. Not the reindeer that people sometimes hunt for food. Strong reindeer - to be able to fly with all those toys and Santa and his sleigh they'd have to be. Their names are Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen... and the most famous reindeer of all is Rudolf, who somehow, was born with a red light for a nose that is so bright it can see through any clouds or storms that might disturb Santa's field of vision whilst flying his sleigh. Why he doesn't get the latest technological radar? I do not know.
Santa lives with lots and lots of little people with pointy ears who enjoy wearing shoes with bells on them. These little people are commonly referred to as elves. They have an amazing work ethic and spend most of the year building the latest toys. They get 6 weeks of vacation a year and great medical benefits. People say Santa and his elves are able to make enough toys for all the boys and girls in the entire world - we are talking millions - and he is able to deliver all of these toys on one night, December 24th a.k.a. Christmas Eve.
Basically, Santa has discovered how to travel at the speed of light, but he has to climb down people's chimney's to get inside their houses so he can distribute these toys. If he would just knock on the door I am sure people would let him in, especially after seeing all those toys he has. Or, maybe he could work something out with the parents and get a key to each house. Can you imagine that key ring? Yikes! I know what you are thinking...
"I have a poopy diaper. Will you change it so we can get back to the story?"
And the answer is yes. I know what else you are thinking...
"What about people who don't have chimneys?"
Just know that Santa will find a way to get inside. No matter what kind of house you live in. He can get past any dog, any alarm... he will get inside.
Santa has lists. He's a list man. I like lists. They help me to feel more organized, so I can see where he is going with lists. Two lists mainly - those who were naughty throughout the year and those who were nice. The nice people get presents. The naughty people get nothing or a lump of coal (but you know, coal can be pressed into diamonds so this is not entirely bad). At least, this is what most adults will tell you because they want you to behave and be nice. The truth is, there are some people who are really nice who sometimes don't get a present. Santa isn't perfect. The world isn't perfect. Maybe sometimes elves who might be mad mess with the list. This is where service comes in. Service is a nice thing to do. Helping someone out. Giving a gift to someone who might not be able to afford it. Making a warm meal for someone hungry. It not only makes other people feel good, but it makes you feel good. Feeling happy is a gift in and of itself. We can help other people by sharing our blessings with them.
Sometimes you will see a Santa sitting in a glorious chair in a mall or at some gathering. He will be there specifically to get direct requests from children or just to meet you for the first time (if you are new to the world) and possibly get a picture. The truth is, most of these so-called Santa's are regular people filling in for Santa. They dress up like him, take your requests, and then send them to Santa in an email. Some kids are smarter than others. Some kids will write a letter to Santa directly with a list of their deepest, most coveted desires for the year. I think it's a good idea to include some examples of what you might have done throughout the year that was 'nice'. Also, use a red or green envelope with a Christmassy stamp of some sort, and stickers. This will get you in good with the Clauses.
It is important for you to understand that if you see Santa somewhere, I do not want you to go up to him without mommy or daddy with you. You do not know him personally or any of his helpers, so technically, they are jolly strangers, and we do not talk to strangers. "
At this point I realized my muffins were burning in the oven and we stopped. I am quite irritated that I burnt the muffins, but, I think I was able to educate my daughter on some of the topics of Christmas quite nicely so it the good and bad of the situation even out nicely.
Some people celebrate the season by serving others, being nicer than usual, doing a lot of shopping, eating a lot of naughty foods, and spreading stories of a man who lives in the north pole known as 'Santa' or 'Santa Claus' or 'Saint Nick'.
Most people here in the U.S. do BOTH of these things. Many of the shopping malls and stores and business people out there have taken advantage of this so you may see an advertisement for a Christmas item in August. Christmas is celebrated differently by many different cultures in many different ways. Some people don't celebrate it at all because they have different beliefs about freedom and about religion and God.
Santa Claus is thought to be a man. He is supposedly a really nice guy with rosy cheeks (probably a case of rosacea) and he speaks every language in the world. He's a people person and loves children of all ages. He is old and obese and he always wears a red and white coat with a black belt - a trend setter really, belts are back... sometimes he wears green to throw in some earthy tones. He has white hair that is quite long and curly and a beard and moustache. His stomach is large, often referred to as his "bowl full of jelly" because it jiggles when he laughs (a possible attempt to make a dangerous health situation funny to make himself feel better) so he probably suffers from diabetes and hypertension - he eats a lot of cookies, hot chocolate and candy. His laugh sounds like he is saying "ho ho ho". He has a wife, Angela Marie Claus, who is probably the one who makes him most of these cookies - living vicariously through him possibly?
He is said to reside in the north pole, which is located at the very top of the planet earth, the planet on which we live. He is quite isolated really for being such a people person... hmm. It is very, very cold up there, which is why he always wears this thick red coat with fur around the sleeves, neck, and ankles, and probably why he gets around in a sleigh - is slides nicely on top of the snow and ice. I am pretty sure Santa is rich, because his heating bill must be through the roof!!
Yes, he drives a sleigh. But it is not pulled by snow dogs, like they have in Alaska. It is pulled by reindeer. Magic reindeer. Not the reindeer that people sometimes hunt for food. Strong reindeer - to be able to fly with all those toys and Santa and his sleigh they'd have to be. Their names are Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen... and the most famous reindeer of all is Rudolf, who somehow, was born with a red light for a nose that is so bright it can see through any clouds or storms that might disturb Santa's field of vision whilst flying his sleigh. Why he doesn't get the latest technological radar? I do not know.
Santa lives with lots and lots of little people with pointy ears who enjoy wearing shoes with bells on them. These little people are commonly referred to as elves. They have an amazing work ethic and spend most of the year building the latest toys. They get 6 weeks of vacation a year and great medical benefits. People say Santa and his elves are able to make enough toys for all the boys and girls in the entire world - we are talking millions - and he is able to deliver all of these toys on one night, December 24th a.k.a. Christmas Eve.
Basically, Santa has discovered how to travel at the speed of light, but he has to climb down people's chimney's to get inside their houses so he can distribute these toys. If he would just knock on the door I am sure people would let him in, especially after seeing all those toys he has. Or, maybe he could work something out with the parents and get a key to each house. Can you imagine that key ring? Yikes! I know what you are thinking...
"I have a poopy diaper. Will you change it so we can get back to the story?"
And the answer is yes. I know what else you are thinking...
"What about people who don't have chimneys?"
Just know that Santa will find a way to get inside. No matter what kind of house you live in. He can get past any dog, any alarm... he will get inside.
Santa has lists. He's a list man. I like lists. They help me to feel more organized, so I can see where he is going with lists. Two lists mainly - those who were naughty throughout the year and those who were nice. The nice people get presents. The naughty people get nothing or a lump of coal (but you know, coal can be pressed into diamonds so this is not entirely bad). At least, this is what most adults will tell you because they want you to behave and be nice. The truth is, there are some people who are really nice who sometimes don't get a present. Santa isn't perfect. The world isn't perfect. Maybe sometimes elves who might be mad mess with the list. This is where service comes in. Service is a nice thing to do. Helping someone out. Giving a gift to someone who might not be able to afford it. Making a warm meal for someone hungry. It not only makes other people feel good, but it makes you feel good. Feeling happy is a gift in and of itself. We can help other people by sharing our blessings with them.
Sometimes you will see a Santa sitting in a glorious chair in a mall or at some gathering. He will be there specifically to get direct requests from children or just to meet you for the first time (if you are new to the world) and possibly get a picture. The truth is, most of these so-called Santa's are regular people filling in for Santa. They dress up like him, take your requests, and then send them to Santa in an email. Some kids are smarter than others. Some kids will write a letter to Santa directly with a list of their deepest, most coveted desires for the year. I think it's a good idea to include some examples of what you might have done throughout the year that was 'nice'. Also, use a red or green envelope with a Christmassy stamp of some sort, and stickers. This will get you in good with the Clauses.
It is important for you to understand that if you see Santa somewhere, I do not want you to go up to him without mommy or daddy with you. You do not know him personally or any of his helpers, so technically, they are jolly strangers, and we do not talk to strangers. "
At this point I realized my muffins were burning in the oven and we stopped. I am quite irritated that I burnt the muffins, but, I think I was able to educate my daughter on some of the topics of Christmas quite nicely so it the good and bad of the situation even out nicely.
1 comment:
You CRACK me up!!! :) Merry Christmas Edith! You have been a very good wife and mother this year and I hope Santa brings you your hearts desire this Christmas..... ;)
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